#180 - If you could start over...
May. 30th, 2007 11:37 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
opiumsoulIn her dreams, sometimes Rev has a different life. She can't ever tell if it's better than the one she actually has - but really, what wouldn't be? - but they're always nice dreams, filled with peace and love and no bad memories.
Her mother never gave her up in these dreams. Rev's usually younger, running along beaches or through flower filled meadows, playing games with a woman who's face she can't see, but she knows she loves her. There's laughter and it's almost perfect and after she's woken up, Rev knows it's not real, or realistic. But that's what dreams are for.
She never had to be just a pretty face in these dreams. People don't fawn over her because she's beautiful and they would never hurt her to keep her beauty for themselves. They like her for who she is and what she is is funny and smart and kind and everything she's not when she's awake. When she knows it's not real or realistic. But that's what dreams are for.
She never had to go see the bad men in these dreams. There's no pain, no bad memories, no triggers that leave her shaking and crying in bed for hours. Everyone is nice and they ask before they do things and if she says no, they listen and she knows that if they didn't, they wouldn't get away with it to do it to her again.
But Rev always wakes up, knowing it's not real or realistic. Because that's what dreams are for.
It's life that's the nightmare.
Her mother never gave her up in these dreams. Rev's usually younger, running along beaches or through flower filled meadows, playing games with a woman who's face she can't see, but she knows she loves her. There's laughter and it's almost perfect and after she's woken up, Rev knows it's not real, or realistic. But that's what dreams are for.
She never had to be just a pretty face in these dreams. People don't fawn over her because she's beautiful and they would never hurt her to keep her beauty for themselves. They like her for who she is and what she is is funny and smart and kind and everything she's not when she's awake. When she knows it's not real or realistic. But that's what dreams are for.
She never had to go see the bad men in these dreams. There's no pain, no bad memories, no triggers that leave her shaking and crying in bed for hours. Everyone is nice and they ask before they do things and if she says no, they listen and she knows that if they didn't, they wouldn't get away with it to do it to her again.
But Rev always wakes up, knowing it's not real or realistic. Because that's what dreams are for.
It's life that's the nightmare.
